Whistle blowing is bad for your health

Ever since the "accidental" and eerily similar pre-election plane crash deaths of Democratic Senators Mel Carnahan and Paul Wellstone as well as the "suicides" of Fortunate Son author James Hatfeild and would-be Enron bean-spiller J. Clifford Baxter not to mention myriad other strange goings on, related and unrelated I have been unable to shake the sneaking suspicion that there's more to the quartz precision timing of all these accidents and suicides than just Preznit Dubya's dumb luck.

And yet, despite all that grisly precedent, even a stone-cold paranoid like me was taken aback by the naked blatancy of the Kelly affair. To precis, Dr David Kelly, a weapons scientist with top level security clearance and unfettered access to all the weapons-related intelligence gathered by his countrymen in the lead-up to the war on Iraq, was found dead in the woods behind his home after it was revealed that he was the inside source for a BBC report on the Blair government's "sexing up" of claims about Iraq's "weapons programmes," and most specifically the infamous "Saddam could hit Europe with chemical weapons in 45 minutes" rubbish claim.

Kelly's revelations nearly brought down the British government, and may yet cost Tony Blair his cushy civil service gig, as well as his spread at 10 Downing. He went out for a woodsy ramble in the pouring rain, with four heart monitor electrodes still stuck to his chest. He warned of "dark actors, playing games." Despite the fact that his friends and family say he was in relatively good spirits, he allegedly hacked open his own left wrist with a pocket knife, then sat there and bled to death. The government claimed he was "stressed" at being outted as the source for the BBC's stories, and that his death was therefore a clear cut case of suicide. Seriously. Stop laughing. And ask yourself, if he was being investigated by the MOD, who thought he was a weak link, would he be wandering around 'unsupervised' by the defence mandarins who are now so happy at his passing? Nah, me neither.

According to a recent poll conducted by Die Zeit magazine, over twenty percent of Germany's population believes the US government may have been behind the terrorist attacks of 9-11, and just under a third of Germans who are thirty years of age and under hold that view. So, why haven't any reputable polling companies asked this question to the American people? Could it be because they don't want anyone to even contemplate that possibility, because - once they start - they might not stop until they reach some uncomfortable conclusions? Or could it be because they fear the numbers would shock and awe their political paymasters, who depend on a docile populace of unquestioning sheeple to maintain their opulent, lobbyist-funded lifestyles? By the way, I know that "reputable polling company" is a classic example of the genus oxymoron. My point was rhetorical.

Okay, so we know that, as the first, easier part of the attaq on Iraq was winding down, PNAC hand-picked Iraqi National Congress leader Ahmad Chalabi to head up a squad of exiled Iraqis with the hope that he would eventually take over control of that country from the United States military. But the minute he set foot on Iraqi soil (you can see his handful of henchmen in almost every piece of news footage of "celebrating crowds in Baghdad"), he started railing against the neighboring nation of Jordan, which happens to be one of the USG's stronger allies in the region. Of course, this probably has nothing to do with the fact that Chalabi once lived and ran a bank in Jordan, or that he was caught stealing millions of dollars from his clients, and sentenced (in absentia) to 20 years in prison for his crimes there. And of course, this probably has nothing to do with the deadly bomb attack on the Jordanian embassy in Iraq that took place three weeks ago, and which is now forgotten in the wake of the deadlier UN mission and Jerusalem bombings (and the mortar attack on an American-run prison, and the sabotage of the water supply, and the blowing up of a major oil pipeline, etc, etc, ad bedlam). So I guess my innocent question here is� how much worse do things have to get before JESUS shows up?!

And speaking of dangerously powerful Christian fundamentalists, if you are one, and you want to go on believing those soothing, comforting myths that allow you live your life without constantly shrieking in terror at the choking realization that, in the long run, everything you've ever known or loved will be sucked down with you into the vacuum void of nothingness when you die� then by all means, stay away from this excellent website!

According to a communique obtained by the Cairo newspaper Al-Hayat, the Al Qaeda terror organization has claimed responsibility for the power grid blackout that threw much of the east coast into darkness last week. This got me thinking� what other heinous things could these attention-seeking reprobates realistically take responsibility for? SARS? Pop Idol? Lack of personal responsibility? Grossly obese chicks who dress as though they don't know they're fat? They are only limited by their imaginations in this regard, so I suspect we can expect more announcements from these guys.

NP Roy Harper - Don't You Grieve