Blind Bottom Wiping - non graphic

Welcome to Baby Ink, where we believe that it's never to early to start expressing your unique personality through professional, high quality body art. Baby Ink locations are non-threatening, family friendly places where people of all ages can feel calm and at ease. Although we are the ORIGINAL body art chain to cater to toddlers and children, our experienced, talented staff is glad to work on people of all ages. So whether you're 8 months or 88 years old, if you're ready for a tattoo or a body piercing-the clear choice is Baby Ink!

Here's a bit of good news for all you bong-sucking basement-dwellers out there. Researchers at the University of California in San Diego have determined that smoking marijuana does NOT cause any kind of long term brain damage. Of course, they would say that, being from San Diego and all. Unfortunately, the researchers couldn't say the same about eating fish-paste and chocolate cake sandwiches, playing Half-Life for 12 hours straight, or many other activities often engaged in by those who have recently partaken in the devil-weed. So most of you are still out of luck.

Bottom wiping blindness

Last week, I was asked: "When does a blind man know he's finished wiping after taking dump?" Being a little slow that day, I couldn't think of a proper answer to his query, nor do I have any blind friends to turn to for guidance in this vital issue.

Fortunately, there were others who were ready, willing and able to step into the breach. Hik wrote: "They wipe with their fingers. After they wipe their assholes then they lick their fingers. After a while when it stop tasting like shit then know when to stop." And then there was Del, who took a stab at it: "I guess the blind man could just sniff the paper after each wipe," he wrote. Don suggested that a blind person could ask a friend, roommate or neighbour to look at the paper on the third wipe, to determine whether or not a fourth - or more - was needed.

And finally, we have Simon, who valiantly struggled against the rip-tide of his obviously crippling learning disability to write: "i have a hypothesis on how blind people know when they are done wiping their ass... they probably wipe away 2 or 3 times... then they could probably smell if there was anymore shit commin off onto the paper... you know since they have that enhanced smelling ablity. or maybe they say fuck you people i dont care if my ass smells like shit. IM FUCKIN BLIND, i got bigger problems"

Thanks to all who helped solve this mystery!